August 5, 2026

Autograph Pages

Autograph Pages

The much-anticipated autograph pages took over the cafeteria tables two weeks before graduation, transforming humble yearbook signings into a full-blown autograph frenzy. Seniors armed with Sharpies of every color crowded into clusters, shouting “Sign mine!” and “Don’t forget doodles!” as they swapped-yearbooks with the urgency of stock traders closing positions. One group even organized a “left-handed signature relay,” deciding that ambidextrous flair would earn bonus points for creativity.

Emcee and class clown Jake led the charge by printing his facsimile signature fifty times per page, joking, “If you can’t decide what to write, just sign it thrice!” Meanwhile, the Drama Club set up an impromptu signing station complete with velvet ropes and a “celebrity” backdrop–members posing as their favorite characters to inspire theatrical inscriptions (“To fellow Maverick, you were the Juliet to my Romeo!”).

Teachers peered in through cafeteria windows, offering dry erase boards for practice runs–some even left encouraging notes like “Don’t sell yourself short–add a doodle!” After the ink dried, the autograph pages shimmered with inside jokes, heartfelt goodbyes, and cartoon caricatures that ranged from adorable to absurd. These handwritten mosaics will forever capture the spirit of Senior Year: messy, heartfelt, and overflowing with Maverick camaraderie.

Annabelle Bransford

Hi, I’m Annabelle Bransford, Memorial High School’s unofficial satirist-in-residence and proud founder of The Daily Detention—a publication so edgy it’s been banned twice and resurrected three times, like a sassy phoenix with a flair for detention slips. I write satire because someone has to hold the line between cafeteria chaos and gym class tyranny. Whether I’m exposing the secret emotional feud between our Algebra teacher and Euclid, or investigating why the pep rally feels like an ancient ritual sacrifice, I try to speak truth to hallway power. Sure, I’ve been called “disruptive,” but mostly by people who wear lanyards unironically. My work has been read by at least two janitors, my entire AP English class, and one substitute teacher who thought it was a cry for help. I consider that range. When I’m not sharpening my wit, I’m dodging group projects, winning banned book club trivia, or mentoring the school's AI Isn’t Funny Club (membership: just me and 17 bots I’ve emotionally manipulated). I’m also a National Merit Semi-Finalist, certified eye-roller at Student Government meetings, and the only girl in school who’s been accused of “weaponizing irony.” My goals? Keep writing, keep laughing, and one day publish a satirical exposé called Yearbook Superlatives and Other Lies. If you want something sugarcoated, try the bake sale. If you want the truth with a punchline, I’m your girl. I've landed a sweet job at Bohiney Magazine, so don't bother me. EMAIL: annabelle@bohiney.com

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